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Inter-Missions!
By Rai
Bowlman: Nine members all quitting at the exact same time? How bizarre.
Bubbleman: Yes blub, but don't let it get you down. Let's dance!
Serenade: My pleasure! Whee, no more gender confusion!
David: And now, to mount my horse...and ride off into the sunset.
Jon: I can finally take these damn bowling shoes off. You may wanna spray these extra before
giving them to the next guy.
Jeremy: The team's actually goin' on without me!? What's the point? I'm the only entertaining
character!
Punk: Get over yerself! It's my spiky bad ass that everyone came ta see!
Darklady: Mmm...it is spiky.
Metalman: Hey, is everyone forgetting my ass? Come on! Buns of steel!
Naomi: Aww, you all have nice asses.
Adrienne: Last to join, second to disappear! HAH! Eat it, commitment!
Matt: You're all so unreliable. I only just quit yesterday.
Flashman: Yeah, after not doing anything or showing up for three years...
Johnny: Kalinka, kiss my lips already! I've been waiting for months!
Flameman: WRAAHHH RREEEHH RROOOHH WRRRYYYYY RAH HAH HAH HAH.
Cyros: It's Jon! Why can't the other two have nicknames instead?
Yamatoman: Very well. All good things must come to an end. Only one thing remains to be
said...
Carlos: No one can stop Mr. Domino!
By Johnny
Johnny: Kalinka! Kiss my lips!
Kalinka: But, I find your neck turns me on even more.* kisses neck*
Johnny: Kalinka! Kiss my lips!
Kalinka: I find your cheeks irrestible! *kisses cheek*
*Johnny is actually dreaming and has rubber darts all over his face*
Stuart: You do know we'll be running for our lives if Johnny wakes up...
Jake:(aiming rubber dart gun)Shush. I'm trying to aim for his mouth.
By Sam
*Phone rings. Sam picks it up*
Sam: Hello?
Dude on Phone: Is this Sam?
Sam: Yes.
Dude on Phone: Good. I need to hire Shade Man for something.
Sam: What!?
Dude on Phone: yeah, you're Sam, right?
Sam: Yeah....
Dude on Phone: Then help me, dangit!!
Sam: You're not looking for me! You're looking for Sam!
Dude on Phone: And you're Sam!
Sam: ARGH!!!
By Nij
AH Warehouse, Morning. Jeremy walks to the “kitchen” for a snack. Nij passes by, damp, naked, with a towel around his waist.
Nij: Dude, we needa get that shower looked at.
Jeremy: Great, what is it now?
Nij: The water doesn’t stay hot for long. I swear, it’s like you just get in, and before
you know it all the hot water’s gone. *Walks off*
Jeremy: Damn it. Good plumbers are damn hard to find. And the whole blindfolding and chloroform
deal to keep this joint secret is hard to pull off…ooh, brownies! *Pulls Brownies™ out of fridge and proceeds to stuff
face* I’ll kick Stu’s ass if he put more of his “special plants” in these…weirdest nightmares I ever had…
Johnny walks by, dripping and wrapped in nothing but a large towel.
Johnny: Hey Jeremy, the shower’s on the fritz again.
Jeremy: Great, what NOW?
Johnny: No hot water. *Pads off*
Jeremy: *Walks across the warehouse to the “living room”* First Nij has problems with the
shower, then right away Johnny—wait. Wait a…minute. *Thinks* Hey, Matt?
Matt: *Lying sideways in recliner, staring at PET* Huh?
Jeremy: When did we get a second shower put in?
Matt: *Half-attentive* Huh? We only have one shower.
Long pause.
Jeremy: Right. I’m going to go beat this image out of my head now.
Matt: Have fun.
By Nij
AH Warehouse.
Jeremy: *Staring at PET, giggling constantly*
Stuart walks by.
Stuart: Um, something funny?
Jeremy: Heheheheheh, lookit!
Stuart looks down at PET screen.
Desertman: Zwoo zaiya zonara zaian zwaza.
Flameman: Raaa, aaaaahh rrrah rarr aaar.
Desertman: Zeia zanaga zwooya zuumana?
Flameman: Raah, rrrraaaah ahhhr hraaah!
Desertman: Zworah!
Flameman: Raaaah!
Stuart: …What the hell are they saying?
Jeremy: *Giggles* I have no idea!
Stuart: Uh-huh. You need a life. *Walks off*
Jeremy: *Continues giggling*
By Nij
AH Network, Afternoon. Punk’s browsing his music collection.
*Badoop*
Punk: An email? Hmm. WHOO! Guys, we got a message from Fate!
The others crowd around him.
Flash: It says his next clue will arrive tomorrow morning, in the form of a limerick.
Beast: Rawr, what’s a limerick?
Flash: You don’t know?
Beast: I’m Yokanese, English isn’t my first language.
Flash: Oh, right. Well, it’s basically a rhyming joke in the form of a poem.
Flame: Yeah! Like, “There once was a girl from Netucket—”
Flash: *Slap*
Flame: YELP!
By Rai
*The phone rings in the NG apartment. David picks it up.*
David: Hello?
Woman: Is this the Net Guardians?
David: Uh yeah. How can I help?
Woman: My navi's pet Spikey ran away! I need one of your agents to find it!
David: Is this a prank? We don't exactly deal in that kind of 'Net Guarding'.
Woman: But your flyer said no job too small,"To serve and protect." "Fees are set."
David: Flyer? How did you get this number? Fees?...Moe! Have you been trying to pimp out the
team?
Moe: *shrugs* A little extra money couldn't hurt.
By Nij
Glyde: Greetings, and welcome once again to Masterpiss Theatre. For your pleasure this evening we
present a scene from Shademan.EXE: Dead and Loving It.
A moonlit night in a crypt in the AC/DC Net Cemetary. Megaman and Protoman enter, and look into an open coffin on a pedastal.
Mega: Oh! My poor, poor Roll! How could I let that dastardly Shademan do this to you?
Proto: You’re an idiot. Take this.
Hands Megaman a GutsHammer and NeedleCannon needle.
Mega: What shall I do with this?
Roll: RAAH!
Mega: *Screams like a little girl*
Proto: She’s not dead yet! She is UNDEAD! She is now a tortured soul trapped between this world
and the next!
Mega: No! How can I save her?!
Proto: You must drive the needle…THROUGH HER HEART!
Mega: Are you insane?
Proto: Yes. *Takes cover behind a pillar* But do it!
Mega: Okay then. And now, my beloved, I set you free!
Whack. BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORSH!
Mega: Oh. My. GOD. THERE’S SO MUCH BLOOD.
Proto: *Peeks* What do you expect, she just ate! She’s not dead yet, hit her again!
Mega: Again? Are you freaking INSANE?
Proto: Yes, we already established that. And anyway, how much blood can she have left? *Hides
again*
Mega: I suppose you have a point.
Whack. BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORSH!
Mega: …I really, really, REALLY hate you now.
Proto: *Peeks again* Oy, we should’ve put newspapers down.